The NFL Gods Must Be On Vacation

What happened?

There used to be a time when young, talented football players would go to college, get polished, grow up, get recruited by the NFL and go on to be superheroes to adoring fans and kids like me. They used to be these shining stars, hopeful Hall of Famers waiting to happen, role models and All American men. They were almost...mythical.

Now it seems that these boys are no longer groomed, given no guidance, have no real support systems and are used as living ATM's. In the game of life, it's almost as if they have been given the ball, blindfolded and told to run downfield toward the goal and good luck making it happen.

Where did it all go wrong? Where did the watchful eye turn away? Why aren't these young men given the skills to handle the unpredictability of their own lives as they do the unpredictability of the game? It's so wrong to see these players sadly going down these horrific roads. Roads which seem almost...epic in their misery. Murder, suicide, weapons charges, rape, tax evasion, assault, drug addiction, dog fighting and domestic abuse. Notably these are things that happen to a lot of people all over the country, but being that these are our gladiators, they are thrust into an echelon that perhaps we cannot possibly understand as non celebrities. However, I feel that if these men have the means and the money, why do they keep getting wrapped up in deviant criminal activities? How does a boy who works his way up through the ranks of the sport and start making tons of money still walk around with a low-brow mentality for dogfighting? Or carrying a weapon to protect himself in venues that are exclusive enough to exclude lowlife violent troublemakers? These are men that went to college. Did they not rub elbows with other students and realise that life is not always so dysfunctional? Did they not learn how to distance themselves from the people they may have grown up with that didn't go to college? Weren't they exposed to all kinds of new things that could not translate back down to their friends that were still hanging out on the corner doing nothing all day? Almost any one of us wants to make money to get away from the stigma of being poor. Most people who make it big "get out" and never look back. It seems these misguided millionaires still hang around that element and it confuses me as to why they still do. And why aren't they given more guidance and preened for their new lives somehow?

I know there are no easy answers, but it seems that not enough people are asking these questions. What I see happening now is that the league is being infected like a disease of misguided youth, greedy and apathetic owners, exploited talent and a sensationalistic society that is more interested in the crime than fixing or properly punishing it.

I feel our heroes are dying and no one cares. The once mighty Titans have fallen. So long as the next boy gets rich and the bottom feeders get their cut, who cares how he makes it downfield as long as it's a good show. Where are the gods?

I Told You!!!!!

When is anyone going to start listening to me?!?! Last year, everyone on EARTH kept saying that Chad was done. His shoulder was blown out. He can't do anything and the Jets should let him go. I kept saying that I knew he had some pep left in him. Everyone laughed at me. I held on to my love for Chad no matter what verbal beatings I took. But I knew. I knew he was still good. And look what happened. Last year's last place team is now in a wild card spot. And what happened with the Jets? Yeah, I watched today's game too. Brett is the one who's done...

I love you Chad....I always will!!

Will Smith

I have to say that I am a great fan of Will Smith. Since his early days as a fledgling actor on the show The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, he has had me. I'll even nowadays catch some of the old episodes in syndication just to relive those hilarious skits. One of my favorite was when he and his cousin Carlton needed to come up with some money so they decide to dance at a male strip club for ladies and win some money. The song they danced to was Apache by the Sugar Hill Gang. Well when they were dancing on stage, Will grabs Carlton by the hands, spins him around, then lets go and throws him across the room!! God I couldn't stop laughing at that scene. Even today I crack up about it. I think one of the greatest things about the show was Will's crazy smile when he looked dead into the camera, being as cheeky as he could be.

But now I have noticed lately that his last group of movies seem to be serious. I feel that I have barely ever seen him crack a smile now in all of his recent roles. What happened?!?! Am I the only one who misses the lighthearted side of Mr. Smith? He was a great comedic actor, yet now he seems to have totally immersed himself in dramatic fare, dare I say dark and brooding. As of late he seems more...I don't know....goth? I don't know, I miss the old Will. Not to put down his roles now, nor am I saying that he shouldn't have any kind of artistic range, but do all the roles have to be so serious?

This Has Gone Too Far....

So have you heard the news about a twenty one year old student in California who has gotten the brilliant idea to sell her virginity to pay for graduate school? This has so many levels of fucking craziness that I'm just going to jump right in...

1) This is supposed to be a woman who is going to graduate school. So apparently she is smart enough to get into graduate school, but yet can find no other recourse to fund her impending graduate education. Really?

2) How do we really know if she is a virgin?

3) What kind of message is she sending to young girls? That all your worth really comes down to--even chasing after a graduate degree--is your pussy. And not even for someone you know, but some creepy strange guy who is willing to log on and pay money. And she'd better hope that the highest bidder doesn't have any diseases or kinky fetishes. Or conversely, perhaps the bidders may not bid that much for her, realising that she is a stupid whore. Well, they wouldn't low-ball because she is a stupid whore, but because they probably would believe she's running some kind of scam (as I do), but are still willing to pay to fuck her. I mean, c'mon, theyre men!!

4) Oh and get this: her major is in WOMEN'S STUDIES. This is how I know this girl is full of shit. I can't even believe that she would even try to undermine a solid subject like women's studies with this kind of bullshit. Just to keep my rant short and sweet, I will just leave it at this:

5) This moronic slut doesn't seem to realise that people will remember who she is in the future. She has really hurt her chances for being taken seriously (if she really is a student and gets a degree) and even more importantly than that, no decent man would touch her. What nice, hard working, loving man with a sense of self esteem would date and marry a gutter slut who sells herself online? Even if she does have a graduate degree.....

I Have Witnessed the End of the Universe

And it is called Hole in the Wall, a show apparantly taken from some Japanese production that I didn't know about until I looked up a picture for this posting. But that still doesn't detract my loathing for the fact that society is devolving into something akin to the movie Idiocracy. Is this what entertainment is now? Watching people fall into a ditch.....over and over again? What's next, people sitting around lighting farts on fire? Poking each other in the eyes? Punching men in the balls with over-sized gloves? Poking boobies? Making people eat hamburgers....wait a minute. I might be giving some TV exec some ideas for the next fall season....

Are You Crazy??

Yeah, so Holly Hunter has this series on cable about this woman who I gather is a cop. Now, this on the heels of the show The Closer, also which I have the same problem with which I am about to explain,

So first off, Holly Hunter is fifty years old. FIFTY. Running around sleeping with men, flashing a dude in the window and acting like she's freakin' thirty. Puhleeze!!

But the real beef I have with this is the woman is FIVE TWO!! Oh my god, what woman of five two can tussle with men like she's tough? Like she has more strength than any bigger man?Now I know entertainment is supposed to stretch the boundaries of imagination, but I can't let this one slide. Hell, I wouldn't even watch the show because she's not hot, not even attractive in the least and she's freakin' old, acting like she's young. Get the hell outta here.

And that's the same problem I have with Kyra "Fishlip" Sedgwick. Oh my god, here's another one who, albeit way better looking than Holly, but none the less still tiny. She's five five. And in scenes where she's thowing men down on an interrogation table, she's holding them down and they're acting like they're all in pain. Puhleeze. An these are men that are taller and bigger than she is. I don't care what any stretch of the imagination begs--little women are not strong enough to hold a bigger man down than her own size. Not the average woman. And as skinny as these women are, again: PUHLEEZE........

TRIBUTE: George Carlin

You know sometimes how there are these iconic personalities that have been with you for as long as you can remember? Someone who for the length of your lucidity has always been there, doing their thing, and you think that they just have to live forever--they have been in your life like the stars have been in your sky. George Carlin was that personality for me. Yet even more notable is the fact that he was the first host of Saturday Night Live, and the show is exactly my age. It's like the two, for me, have been everything about comedy. And now one half is gone.

What I liked about George is that he was right up my alley: unafraid, unapologetic, unabashed, always pushing the limits of what he is told he can and cannot do, political, intelligent, energetic, prolific and sound. He was very expressive with his words but also with is face. He was almost angelic with his ability to go over to the edge, push you over, but bring you back with his brand of realism that made you forgive some of the things he said that may have been out of your limit of taste. Once he got on a roll, he wouldn't stop...I liked his motormouth....

I cannot say that he was one of my top favorite comedians, but I can say that I respected him immensely and I do know that he had inspired generations of comedians with his brand of humor. I can honestly say that Dennis Miller or Bill Maher have almost certainly taken much from George. Lewis Black has a lot of George in him. And I would argue that Bobby Slaton has some of George's spirit in him. And not just that kind of humor has George inspired, but across all genre's of comedy has he inspired some of my favorite comedians. Although George was not one of my favorites does not mean he wasn't on my list. And I will miss him tremendously.

Heaven is not going to be the same......

Brooklyn Pride!!

Saturday, 14 June was the Brooklyn Pride parade, going down the 7th Avenue strip in Park Slope. It would have been even better than the fun parade it already was if it hadn't kept raining and raining on the....well, parade. And of course, sometimes I can be a little obtuse--I thought I had missed the parade from earlier in the day and was a bit bummed about it. However, thank god I carry my camera with me everywhere as I was able to squeeze off a few snaps as I realised that the parade had started to happen and also before my battery went dead!! Yet another misfortune that could have put a cloud over the celebration, but I was gratetful for the few pictures I got to post here, as well as for the fact that they were throwing favors off the floats Mardi Gras style. I am like a kid all over again when I get fun glowy necklaces, rainbow colored spongy balls, T-shirts and other fun stuff!! I nabbed two glowy necklaces. Well anyway, here are the pictures I got....

This was an awesome marching band that was playing the festive happy marching music of any parade Americana. I loved it. They played so well!!

Here is another group who marched together, but they weren't playing any instruments. Still they marched and were smiling and festive so I snapped them.

This picture pretty much explains itself.

This is my favorite. This lively character was twirling a glowy baton and doing it exceptionally well. I was amazed!! I haven't seen baton twirling for a while and I happen to be a fan of the talent. It was really amazing how he twirled and even cooler is the exact moment I caught him in this pose, almost like he knew exactly when to throw up his hand, flash his pearly whites and pose so dramatically for my camera eye. I wish I had gotten a chance to speak with him.

Now here is another great picture with a drag queen and I also happen to be a great big fan of drag queens too!! There were really not enough in the parade. I like drag queens because they have so much creative energy to put together so many awesome outfits. Not to mention the kick ass make-up. This particular queen actually started to do a high-pitched scream and ran right up to me hoping to scare or rattle me. But I didn't even blink. He said he was amazed that I didn't even flinch. Then I gave him a hug and he ran off. I wanted to talk to him too....

Here is one of the the last big floats that pretty much rounded up the parade. I was sad to see it end so quickly, as I am used to the Manhattan parade which goes on and on and has so many great floats. But I am not going to complain. Brooklyn will get bigger and bigger and then we will one day rival the Manhattan parade.

HAPPY PRIDE EVERYONE!!!

Is It Just Me?

I have never denied the magnitude of my dorkosity...and now is no different. I do not watch sitcoms. Well, in first run anyway. I seem to have gotten into a few that are now in syndication (because they're on all the damn time) and Home Improvement is one of them. Not that I had really any prior knowledge of what the show was about, but I started watching it, not turning the channel when it came on, because I think Tim Allen is so great looking. Yeah, I said it--he's handsome. (Look at him!!)

However, I have come to realise that his show is so very middle American that it kind of makes me insane. The show seems to explore gender roles a lot, and what has kept my attention is that his wife on the show doesn't let him get away with anything, which is cool by the feminist standard. However, she is a stereotypical wife, in which she is very naggy, hard headed and talks considerably....and fast, with almost a high-pitched squeak. And the rest of the family are all men--three boys and Tim--and they have the typical woman cracks about her that are just too much. They make fun of her cooking, they make fun of her telling stories to the boys about being a little girl (instead of a boy), they make fun of her not being able to handle a dead rat, they make fun of her lack of fix-it skills (although I don't know of any woman that has three boys that can't fix a thing--puhleeeze!!). And yet also, she is working, going to school and still has time to get home, have dinner on the table (also cooking breakfast in the morning and sending the boys off to school), do the laundry and cleaning and take care of the boys and Tim. Wow. I have no kids nor a man in the house and I can barely have time for my little dog just because of one nine to fiver!! Either that woman was like Hermione and had some kind of time travel device or this show was just flagrant fantasy. I opt for the latter.

But yet also there was the next door neighbor Wilson, who for some strange reason you could never see his face. And he was the sort of hippie of the fray. He was world traveled, very educated, spiritual, philosophical and wise. Why couldn't we ever see his face? I could get into some kind of analysis about that, but I don't think the writers were ever really that deep. I think the blatantly wanted to kind of have this hippie-ish man as a peripheral personality. He acted as counsel to Tim in times of strife or confusion. And he always had an answer for Tim for his problems. Now it seems that Tim's character was always in need of something from Wilson, but I almost went nuts when they would make fun of Wilson for doing things like rain dances or writing poetry or having an African mucous cup. They went to a "beat" performance that Wilson did one time in which there was a lot of experimental art and poetry, music and performance and the family was there (again, how Jill the wife has all this time goes beyond the realm of believability) making faces and cracking on the performers. It was really kind of annoying.

That's when it hit me that this show was totally geared toward middle America. It was like they were on the cusp of breaking through the closed-mindedness of many middle Americans when it comes to different people or even art for *bleeps* sakes, but they never crossed over. And it's weird because they are so close to crossing over that I still keep watching the show!! And I happen to have seen some of Tim Allen's stand up from when he was young and I don't get the sense he was like that. He was a lot edgier. But of course, getting your own sitcom really is like selling your soul. And for what? To make fat housewives laugh?

To be honest, I may watch the show some more, but now that I realise what it is for what it is, the realisation has kind of spoiled the lighthearted care by which I let the show stay on the tube. But then that is why I really don't watch sitcoms at all. They are so ridiculous and all have the same stupid storylines and everyone fights then makes up with these Disney-like conclusions about why they were fighting and preaching to the viewer. UGH!! My skin is crawling just thinking about it now. The only sitcom that I find is outside of this realm, which also I didn't watch in first run is Seinfeld. Oh how so very not middle American!!

ALBUM REVIEW: DJ Slouch

New Music by my friend DJ Slouch, one an EP called "Labor" and his full length album called "Travels".

Labor moves you in and out of an ambient euphony on the first track, aptly named Kaleidoscopes, with layers of strings (violins and guitars), transient beats and a floating melodic voice. It is a deep, complex richness reminiscent of a kaleidoscopic image, but with sound. My favorite track on this EP is the very next song, Black Coffee, which when I first heard it brought St. Germain to mind. But Slouch gives this kind of mix his own distinct voice. He is more energetic and fresh than Germain. Trippy electronica and that ethereal touch flavor this track with thoughts of walking through a city street after rain, swinging around arm-locked with your sweetheart. The rest of the tracks fit seamlessly with the first two with an overall urban vibe, sweet whispers, delicious funk and loungey charm.

The Travels album starts out with the same sublime sound as Labor, yet has a heavy helping of jazz styling to it. He adds more layer (if that is even possible) of delicate electronic sounds, ambient chorus and what seems vaguely experimental, without alienating the listener--as much experimental tends to do. My favorite track on this album is Airlock which to me sounds like what would come to being if Hooverphonic, Moby and Muddy Waters all got together and messed around in a studio!! Again, Slouch has this style that is so very gothic-urban, sans any depressing aspect at all. Quite the contrary, his style is poignant to me. Every time I put it on, I want to be in a dark speak-easy somewhere, drinking martini's and flirting with sophisticated, suited men.

You can find him on Facebook under the name Ian Bradley (the name on his driver's license) and find links to hear some of his music. I highly suggest you please your ears with his sonance.